How do I tell this crazy story? 

How can it be that nobody, except my inner unsilenceable-self, jumped out of their seats and threw their beers at the tv screen, unhinged at the insanity on the big screen?

How have we become so numb to lies? To hatred? To cruelty? That it can come up between innings of the world series and its just considered status quo?

Yes, it was a political commercial, but this is not an exposition about taking sides. It is an expression of horror and sorrow at what we say yes to, through silence or numbness or apathy.

I do not give a rat’s elbow about belief systems.It is never ok, never ok, to name call, to attack and create division by “othering.” Never. 

How did we fail kindergarten– ALL OF US?! 

And where have I been that this blew my mind? Yes, I live without TV, yes I am selective about media. But when did this leap into insanity happen?

And how is it that I would have been the one that looked crazy if I had screamed in horror in The Brickroom that evening? 

And how is it that that threat of seeming crazy actually kept me silent and in my seat? 

Oh no.Me too.

And now, after the election,many people are rejoicing and vindicated, while many others are grieving and terrorized.And we are all here together–that won’t change no matter who our leaders are. 

SO, let’s stop the madness of accusation and othering and do the work. It is crystal clear to me what the collective is showing us; it’s past time to take a look in the darkest corners, to face our shadows, to tend to our inner bully, rapist, misogynist and liar…it is in there it is. 

Will we pick this up and do our part? 

This is what we can do and this is what we, so far, refuse to do.   

So, in this season of rising darkness (which is also the season of gathering), can we reflect deeply and honestly on our own interior evils and demons, on their impact on ourselves and each other? 

Can we? 

I don’t know about we, but I do know about me. This winter I devote myself to shining a light into the darkest places inside.* 

And I offer myself to you. Should you choose to explore your darkest places—I am right here and strong enough, clear enough, in love with Life enough, to hold the darkness with you. Let’s go there. Together. Xx

*I need to say, that I would not have been able to do this last winter; the darkness of my own life was just too great. I say this as not all of us can actually do this work right now, and that’s real also…